“Does What I’m Doing Even Matter?” | The Day I Almost Walked Away from Teaching | by Mohd Amil | Inspiring Story #239

It was September, around 11:15 in the morning.

The classroom was small and slightly crowded. Two white tube lights glowed overhead, as daylight shone through the windows. The ceiling fan moved slowly, making an uneven sound.

Around forty-five students sat on long wooden benches. Some benches were new. Others were old and slightly shaky. The blackboard looked worn, with notes from the previous teacher still visible.

When I walked in, the room fell quiet. A few students stopped mid-conversation. Some avoided eye contact. Others kept their heads down. I asked a simple question in English.

No one answered. Not even a raised hand. 

Misunderstandings in the Classroom

That was my first day teaching English in a minority institution in Kanpur. When I joined, I believed if I gave my best to my students, they would enjoy learning and progress well.

But things weren’t so simple. Where there is fear, progress slows. And rather than enthusiasm and seeing the opportunity for learning English, I found resistance and hesitation.

My teaching methods were questioned. Some students misunderstood my approach. I was teaching fundamentals while they wanted quick results. 

Does What I’m Doing Even Matter?

One afternoon I sat alone after class wondering if dedication truly mattered. While others in government positions earned high salaries, I earned barely a fraction of that. I gazed out the window, questioning if it was time to give up at this school.

My principal walked in. He looked me straight in the eye.

“Is this how you want to face society?”

His words were strong, but they awakened something inside me. I realized that leaving would not solve anything. So, I decided to adapt my methods.

More Going On Than I Could First See

I started teaching extra classes with fewer students.

I was able to give them more time and attention. Slowly, students who had been silent began to respond, even if it was only a word or two. They struggled, but they stayed with it.

One day, I asked a student his father’s name.

He paused. “Sir… he is no more.” He said it quietly, without looking up.

In that moment, I understood that teaching is not only about fundamentals. It is also about being present when a young heart carries fear or silent pain.

Better Job Offer, Better Salary -  I Thought About Leaving

Later, I received a better job offer with better pay.

I stood near the blackboard when I told my class I might not continue the next term. Chalk dust still on my fingers. My chair was beside me.

At first, no one reacted. Then one student stood up.

“Sir, please don’t leave us.”
His voice was soft, but it carried across the room.

Near the window, a boy who rarely spoke started crying. He tried to hide it, wiping his eyes with the back of his hand, but he couldn’t stop. His shoulders shook as he looked down at his desk.

The room was silent again. I looked at their faces. This job was no longer about salary.
I decided to stay. 

The Impact a Teacher Has on Students Can’t Always Be Seen

A week later, there was a speech competition in the main school hall.

Plastic chairs were arranged in rows. A small stage had been set up at the front. Teachers sat together near the back.

When my student’s name was called, my heart started beating faster. He walked slowly onto the stage. He stood facing audience and began his speech in English. I stayed holding the edge of my chair, listening. His voice was steady, and I saw no fear in his eyes. 

This was the work, I thought.  Some decisions may look simple from the outside. We might choose a better salary or an easier path. But not all value can be measured that way.

If even one student finds courage because I did not give up, then every tear, every doubt, and every challenge was worth it.

Sometimes, what matters most is only revealed when you choose to stay.